I’m in my late 50’s and have severe dry eyes and Parkinsonism. My prognosis is questionable. I have two young daughters. To what extent should I confide the details of my illness to my daughters? Is it better to wait until they are older? (Bat Mitzvah age, for example)? I realize that only general guidelines can be given by the Rabbi as to the pros and cons.
My response to you comes together with my blessings for your improvement and long life!
When considering whether and what to tell your daughters, ask yourself whose interests such disclosure would serve. Be as honest as you possibly can. Why do I want them to know? Why do I think that they should know? What would I wish them to do with the information? What is the likelihood (given their development and personalities) that they would, in fact, do what I would wish them to with the information.
My experience has shown that we often burden others with disclosures that they simply cannot use in any fruitful way, largely because we were unwilling to ask the tough questions of why we were interested in the disclosure in the first place.
Hope this is helpful as a starting guideline.
With blessings,
edb
Dear Rabbi — Your thoughtful answer gave me a new way of considering my
dilemma. Thank you!!!