I don’t understand one of the 10 commandments. The one about coveting your neighbor. All of the other 9 are about actions, and these make sense. But how can G-d control our thoughts? How are we supposed to avoid thinking something?
Thank you for your question. It truly is a very profound issue that you are addressing. I would like to address your question with a fascinating observation. The Torah portion immediately following the giving of the Ten Commandments is called Mishpatim. The laws of personal property, torts and various other aspects of monetary and civil law. The Ramban (Nachmanidies) explains that this entire portion of the Torah comes to further define and explain the Commandment of “Lo tachmod, thou shall not covet.” He explains that one must know clearly whose is whose and what is what in order to fulfill this Commandment.
I once questioned why the Ramban chose this law and not “Lo tignov,” the prohibition against stealing? I believe that the answer lies in your very question. We *are* expected to control our thoughts! G-d does not want us to merely “act” like good people and go through the motions. He wants us to truly *be* good people – inside and out. It is for this reason, I believe, that the Ramban explains that an entire portion of the Torah is dedicated to helping us internalize this – to realize that there are things that are ours and things that are not. Coveting comes from a person feeling that he or she does not have “enough.” A person should work on him or herself to realize that we always have exactly what Hashem gave us for our needs.
So it is not G-d controlling our thoughts – but Him wanting us to control our own. And we do this by trying to focus on what we have and our trust in G-d that He provides for us exactly what we need. I hope this helped to clarify this issue for you.
Rabbi Rosenstein