My son has been diagnosed with brain cancer. I’m considering giving a talk to a group about my experience. How can I relate our hope and the comfort we receive from Prayer and the Torah. I want to share our faith as it relates to Judaism.

First of all, I want to express my sincere sorrow about your son’s diagnosis coupled with the hope that his condition can and will improve. Of course, I do not know any details, but I pray that G-d take care of him.Your question is a very difficult one. This type of experience is a very personal one and of course I cannot imagine what you and your family are going through. Any thoughts I might share are almost patronizing since only you know how you feel and how to relate those feelings to your personal connection to G-d. Only someone in your position can truly express how to reach G-d in such circumstances. Anything I may offer is somewhat superficial, whereas your submissions are heartfelt and real.

Having said that, if you are still looking for some ideas, I can only offer some very general concepts regarding faith, suffering, prayer and Torah study. You may apply these ideas to your personal life or may choose to discard them entirely, which I would understand completely.

As a general rule, Judaism believes that on the deepest level of reality, there is no evil and no bad in the universe. It is only in this limited reality that we live in that we experience what seems like bad and evil. In truth, on the deepest level, all is good. Every event which occurs in the world, somehow, someway, is part of G-d’s master plan and thus is for our benefit and the benefit of mankind. Of course, this level of reality is completely obscured from us. We see events only as evil and negative. How possibly can the Holocaust (as an extreme example) be positive and good? We have no idea. And in this world, we can have know idea. In the world to come, we will be shown how every event of human history led to the ultimate salvation and every event was a necessary and positive step in that process. However, again, in this world, we have no insight into that deeper level of reality. We have no understanding. The only thing we have is faith. Complete faith that G-d is ultimately running the show, and that every event is part of the plan. That everything which happens, even things which seem so difficult and severe, are for the benefit of all humanity. No matter how impossible that may seem. That is our faith.

Of course, such faith takes tremendous effort and energy to achieve. Several lifetimes may not be enough to develop such faith. I know for myself, I lose that faith fairly easily, even for relatively minor events in my life. Certainly, such faith cannot be expected of people who have recently encountered a life changing event. And such a faith should not be preached to someone who has recently encountered such an event. This faith can only be developed by each person, arriving at this conclusion on his/her own accord.

One of the ways to attain such a level of faith is through prayer and study. Prayer connects us to G-d and helps us submit ourselves to G-d. Prayer helps us recognize the greatness and goodness of G-d. His control in our lives and the lives of all humanity. In a sense prayer directs our emotions to G-d.

Torah study directs our intellect to G-d. Connecting our intelligence to the “intelligence” and wisdom of the Holy Torah we received over 3000 years ago on Har Sinai. Torah study helps focus our understanding of the world, no matter how little sense it seems to make, to that of the Creator. To align our knowledge of the world, of all that happens to us, whether good or bad, with that of G-d. This understanding also helps deepen our faith of the Master plan and the deeper reality which we will only be privy to in the next world.

I hope these thoughts help you formulate your own thoughts in some way. I truly wish only the best for you and your family.

Be well,
Rabbi Yoel Spotts